Before the teacher comes and tortures me with tuition, let me blog for a while. (:

Leaving tomorrow night. I'm having mixed feelings about the trip right now. Just started packing, and when I do I'm thinking about how it's going to be so awesome and exciting, but also how tedious and inconvenient it would be to bring your stuff around with you and making sure they're in check all the time. When I think of how I'm spending 10 days with my friends, I get really high and excited. But then when I think of how I'm leaving Singapore, leaving my family, leaving you, I feel empty.

Mum said yesterday that I was going to get back my phone for the Europe trip; I don't know if that means that I'll only get to use it for the Europe trip or that I'm getting it back for real. Well now that I have hope I'm getting really desperate and that isn't really very good. I don't know what my reaction will be if I don't get my phone back. As of now, the situation is really... unpredictable? My parents seem not to be mentioning anything about my phone and it hasn't even been more than 24 hours yet. I don't know if they had a discussion last night or something and decided instead not to give my phone back. I'm just really hoping that I'll get it back tomorrow. Or today. Pray pray pray.

Parents already passed me the camera (Canon G9!) and the Euros for the trip. Don't know if they'll be passing my phone back next :\ It sucks to be in suspense. Why can't I just get it over with? But I don't dare to ask. Such a fragile issue. I want to know, yet I don't. Parents are asking me to let them check what I'm bringing. That makes me feel like I'm something suspicious. I'm not going to bring anything like drugs or something okay?

I learnt last night that I'm an, and I quote, "unpredictable woman", and "crazy girl". Well whatever the case, I'll still be yours. (; Well looks like I'm not going to be able to fully enjoy the trip. It'll be fun, yes, but I'll be missing you at the same time.

Do you know what it is like to be lonely? It's how you may be surrounded by all the best friends in the world, how they're doing all those nice things for you, but yet you still feel so empty, as if you're being torn up from the inside. You want to complain to a certain someone, you want to pour out all those negative feelings to him, but you can't because he's not there, and that makes it even worse. Then you feel like crying, but you can't because then the people around you will start to suspect something. You may be able to complain to your closest friend, but that does not abate the emptiness completely because that someone still isn't there. It hurts more because that someone is so precious and means so much to you, and you can't blame him because he isn't doing it on purpose, and it isn't his fault you're feeling that way.

You don't know the extent to which I am missing you.

Girl: Let’s break up.

Boy: When we were together… How many times did we hold hands?

Girl: I said, let’s break up.

Boy: Okay, okay, but how many times did we hold hands when we were together?

Girl: Three times.

Boy: You remember it all? The first time was to show you that I like you. The second time was to show you that I loved you. The third time was to show you I believed in you.

Girl: ....

-Then the boy grinned and took the girls hands firmly and said:

Boy: And now, I’m holding your hand for the fourth time. It’s my last chance to catch you again. Don’t leave.

Before the teacher comes and tortures me with tuition, let me blog for a while. (:

Leaving tomorrow night. I'm having mixed feelings about the trip right now. Just started packing, and when I do I'm thinking about how it's going to be so awesome and exciting, but also how tedious and inconvenient it would be to bring your stuff around with you and making sure they're in check all the time. When I think of how I'm spending 10 days with my friends, I get really high and excited. But then when I think of how I'm leaving Singapore, leaving my family, leaving you, I feel empty.

Mum said yesterday that I was going to get back my phone for the Europe trip; I don't know if that means that I'll only get to use it for the Europe trip or that I'm getting it back for real. Well now that I have hope I'm getting really desperate and that isn't really very good. I don't know what my reaction will be if I don't get my phone back. As of now, the situation is really... unpredictable? My parents seem not to be mentioning anything about my phone and it hasn't even been more than 24 hours yet. I don't know if they had a discussion last night or something and decided instead not to give my phone back. I'm just really hoping that I'll get it back tomorrow. Or today. Pray pray pray.

Parents already passed me the camera (Canon G9!) and the Euros for the trip. Don't know if they'll be passing my phone back next :\ It sucks to be in suspense. Why can't I just get it over with? But I don't dare to ask. Such a fragile issue. I want to know, yet I don't. Parents are asking me to let them check what I'm bringing. That makes me feel like I'm something suspicious. I'm not going to bring anything like drugs or something okay?

I learnt last night that I'm an, and I quote, "unpredictable woman", and "crazy girl". Well whatever the case, I'll still be yours. (; Well looks like I'm not going to be able to fully enjoy the trip. It'll be fun, yes, but I'll be missing you at the same time.

Do you know what it is like to be lonely? It's how you may be surrounded by all the best friends in the world, how they're doing all those nice things for you, but yet you still feel so empty, as if you're being torn up from the inside. You want to complain to a certain someone, you want to pour out all those negative feelings to him, but you can't because he's not there, and that makes it even worse. Then you feel like crying, but you can't because then the people around you will start to suspect something. You may be able to complain to your closest friend, but that does not abate the emptiness completely because that someone still isn't there. It hurts more because that someone is so precious and means so much to you, and you can't blame him because he isn't doing it on purpose, and it isn't his fault you're feeling that way.

You don't know the extent to which I am missing you.

Girl: Let’s break up.

Boy: When we were together… How many times did we hold hands?

Girl: I said, let’s break up.

Boy: Okay, okay, but how many times did we hold hands when we were together?

Girl: Three times.

Boy: You remember it all? The first time was to show you that I like you. The second time was to show you that I loved you. The third time was to show you I believed in you.

Girl: ....

-Then the boy grinned and took the girls hands firmly and said:

Boy: And now, I’m holding your hand for the fourth time. It’s my last chance to catch you again. Don’t leave.