Hello December.
So... it's the last month of the year 2012. I'm sure many will disagree with me, but 2012 wasn't exactly the greatest year for me. Yes, there were good times, memorable times, times I would never forget. But there were also so many things which I regret now. Decisions which I wish I hadn't made. Decisions I wouldn't have made had I known the outcome. And the things that God put me through this year honestly wasn't what I wanted, but I'm sure He has a purpose for bringing me through the year, as always.
One thing to be thankful for in the very least is the very fact that God has brought me through 2012. There are so many blessings He has granted me, even the littlest things that I often take for granted. I'm really thankful that God has protected me throughout the year, without any serious physical injuries. And I'm thankful that He has brought me through the academic year of J1, a really really big jump from Sec 4, without any major setbacks. And last but not least, I am so grateful for God's grace, love and forgiveness for me, even though I've drifted away from Him countless times this year, even after I said I wouldn't. Yet He has brought me closer to Him, not giving up on me no matter how many times I've failed, and I'm eternally grateful to be His child. :)
I know some consequences I've brought unto myself. I just can't help but feel that this year was a year filled with regret, and it's mainly my fault that the year turned out this way. I shouldn't be worrying too much about what others think of me, but I really am wondering, what do others who know the whole truth be thinking about me? Disappointed, definitely. I don't know, disgusted? Angry? Shocked? Sometimes I just really want to look at myself from another's point of view and find out what they see in me. If someone were to ask me, "Do you think you're a good person?" My answer would be a straight "No."
Just to sidetrack a bit, some of the alumni went back to help out for the NYSE-HCISO combined camp just last week. We were mainly helping out for the night games, facilitating and being game masters. Those two days really tired me out (must really be getting old), but it was really nostalgic and fun to be in the midst of juniors and the NYSE spirit again. I'm not sure if it's just me, but this batch of NYSE juniors seem a lot more... bonded? Interaction has definitely improved a lot, or perhaps it's just that now I'm looking at it from the sidelines, and I never really noticed the interaction while we were still in NYSE. I really miss the atmosphere in that beloved room M404, it holds so many memories, together with having rehearsals and just having good fun. Really touched by a line which Mr Sze said the first night, "You may think that once they've left the CCA they're not really a part of it any more, but that's not what I think. Once they've been in strings, it's a lifetime membership. They're always welcome back home." :')
December's going to be a really busy month for me, having many camps and overseas trips. Just hope I'll still be able to find time to settle down and revise more before being thrown back into school as a J2 student. :/ Going for YF camp tomorrow till Saturday, looking forward to having a great time! :) (and hopefully there'll be time to study)
VOTD:
"But in fact Christ has been raised from the dead, the firstfruits of those who have fallen asleep. For as by a man came death, by a man has come also the resurrection of the dead. For as in Adam all die, so also in Christ shall all be made alive." 1 Corinthians 15:20-22 (ESV)
Hello December.
So... it's the last month of the year 2012. I'm sure many will disagree with me, but 2012 wasn't exactly the greatest year for me. Yes, there were good times, memorable times, times I would never forget. But there were also so many things which I regret now. Decisions which I wish I hadn't made. Decisions I wouldn't have made had I known the outcome. And the things that God put me through this year honestly wasn't what I wanted, but I'm sure He has a purpose for bringing me through the year, as always.
One thing to be thankful for in the very least is the very fact that God has brought me through 2012. There are so many blessings He has granted me, even the littlest things that I often take for granted. I'm really thankful that God has protected me throughout the year, without any serious physical injuries. And I'm thankful that He has brought me through the academic year of J1, a really really big jump from Sec 4, without any major setbacks. And last but not least, I am so grateful for God's grace, love and forgiveness for me, even though I've drifted away from Him countless times this year, even after I said I wouldn't. Yet He has brought me closer to Him, not giving up on me no matter how many times I've failed, and I'm eternally grateful to be His child. :)
I know some consequences I've brought unto myself. I just can't help but feel that this year was a year filled with regret, and it's mainly my fault that the year turned out this way. I shouldn't be worrying too much about what others think of me, but I really am wondering, what do others who know the whole truth be thinking about me? Disappointed, definitely. I don't know, disgusted? Angry? Shocked? Sometimes I just really want to look at myself from another's point of view and find out what they see in me. If someone were to ask me, "Do you think you're a good person?" My answer would be a straight "No."
Just to sidetrack a bit, some of the alumni went back to help out for the NYSE-HCISO combined camp just last week. We were mainly helping out for the night games, facilitating and being game masters. Those two days really tired me out (must really be getting old), but it was really nostalgic and fun to be in the midst of juniors and the NYSE spirit again. I'm not sure if it's just me, but this batch of NYSE juniors seem a lot more... bonded? Interaction has definitely improved a lot, or perhaps it's just that now I'm looking at it from the sidelines, and I never really noticed the interaction while we were still in NYSE. I really miss the atmosphere in that beloved room M404, it holds so many memories, together with having rehearsals and just having good fun. Really touched by a line which Mr Sze said the first night, "You may think that once they've left the CCA they're not really a part of it any more, but that's not what I think. Once they've been in strings, it's a lifetime membership. They're always welcome back home." :')
December's going to be a really busy month for me, having many camps and overseas trips. Just hope I'll still be able to find time to settle down and revise more before being thrown back into school as a J2 student. :/ Going for YF camp tomorrow till Saturday, looking forward to having a great time! :) (and hopefully there'll be time to study)
VOTD:
"But in fact Christ has been raised from the dead, the firstfruits of those who have fallen asleep. For as by a man came death, by a man has come also the resurrection of the dead. For as in Adam all die, so also in Christ shall all be made alive." 1 Corinthians 15:20-22 (ESV)
Follow me on Instagram
